In CIJI’S story I started with the beginning; however, my story starts with the end. I am a 27-year-old UC Berkeley graduate with a BA in Media Studies. I am currently working towards a Master’s in Communication Studies with a focus on rehabilitation. I have traveled across the world and met people from all walks of life. I am happily engaged to my high school sweetheart who makes every day the happiest day of my life.

Until December 2010, I had no complaints about life. Yes, I didn’t have the easiest childhood but my past was behind me and I was working hard to earn my BA. I could see the “American Dream” ahead of me—graduate from a prestigious college, get hired at a successful company, plan a wedding, and prepare for 2.5 children with the white picket fence. In other words, I was optimistic about my future. In the events I just mentioned I had always assumed my big sister would be by my side. She was the one who convinced me to go to UC Berkeley, the best choice I ever made other than marrying my high school sweet heart. I had imagined her standing next to my future wife at our wedding and smiling at her tiny nephew. I was completely unprepared for the phone call I received on December 10th, 2010. My uncle had called to console me about my sister’s suicide, unknowingly delivering the news at the same time. I was 500 miles away and my sister had committed suicide. I never had felt so alone in my life, I never understood darkness alike the abyss I had just been casted into, I never knew the last time I hugged my sister was the last time I would ever hold her and I never knew loneliness until I laid down on my bed and wept over the loss of my sister without so much as a friend or companion to console me. I was 500 miles away form my closest family and friends, I might as well have been on a different continent. To my surprise, the love and compassion that I needed more than anything came from the staff at the University of California Berkeley. To this day, it is difficult to put into words how the unconditional love and humanitarian acts of kindness that the staff at UCB engulfed me in. These small acts of kindness changed my life forever.

I owe my success to the talented educational professionals throughout my life that have inspired me to pursue higher education. Growing up I would have never classified myself as smart but I was blessed with teachers that cared. My education has given me the tools necessary to build the nonprofit and website you are now visiting.

After my sister’s death I didn’t have the money to afford counseling. I was already eating egg whites for two meals a day; expensive counseling would have literally took the food off my plate as a college student. Higher education enabled me to research addiction, suicide, and depression while attending the graduate program at the prestigious CSUN. My healing was the research process. I read about the repercussions of losing someone to suicide and in doing so was able to handle the many negative thoughts and feelings that swarmed through my head. For so long I felt detached from the world thinking no one understood what I was going through. My findings demonstrated that the issues surrounding my sister’s death are not unique; millions of people suffer from the pain, guilt, and loneliness that I felt. The more research I conducted the more I realized how connected I was to people around the world going through the same experience. Regardless of culture, race, or age the questions we ask ourselves after someone we love dies from suicide or overdose are universal. Armed with this knowledge, I decided to channel my grief into something positive. My hope is to help people through educational programs in schools. Education has played such a large role in my life that I want others to have free access to a community of resources that will help them overcome their issues as well. I dedicate all my success to my mother, sister, fiancé’ and most importantly every teacher I’ve ever had because your passion and love was contagious which has allowed me to find the best in others in any situation.