"Ralphie: Ohhhh fuuudge!
Ralphie as Adult: [narrating] Only I didn't say ""Fudge."" I said THE word, the big one, the queen-mother of dirty words, the ""F-dash-dash-dash"" word!
Mr. Parker: [stunned] *What* did you say?
Ralphie: Uh, um...
Mr. Parker: That's... what I thought you said. Get in the car. Go on!
Ralphie as Adult: [narrating] It was all over - I was dead. What would it be? The guillotine? Hanging? The chair? The rack? The Chinese water torture? Hmmph. Mere child's play compared t